I feel so helpless and clueless now . I feel like the whole world is deceiving me . I can't seem to trust anyone anymore , everyone seems to be lying to me , even my closest friend .
There's a hidden text here.
Ask me for the password and I'll decide if I wanna give you.
Another guy , claimed that he love me alot . He said he will wait for me , wait till I've moved on , forget about the guy I love . But now , he disappeared . Of course i wouldn't want him to wait for me . I just find it funny , funny how he said he will wait and now he's giving up easily . It made me even more certain that his words can't be trusted .
One of my closest friend , a friend who is quite important in my life . I used to share everything with her . Because I feel comfortable telling her my problems . But then , suddenly she left me . Not really leave , but somehow , she wasn't there for me like she used to . I believe it isn't worth it to grieve over this .
This world is too judgmental . I hate it . I feel so tired being in this society full of people judging me here and there . I tweet about how I feel and immediately , I'm being judged . They thought it's easy for me . Come on , this is nothing ? Why not try going through what I've been through , you will feel like dying . I'm suicidal almost everyday . But still , I remain strong . I smile and laugh like nothing happened . Everyone believed it . No one ever care to ask " Are you sure you are okay ? " Even if they ask and I said I'm fine , they believed and that's it . But all I want is , for them to ask over and over again , till I say no , I'm not fine .
I made a conclusion through all this . No one ever stays . The only people who will stay by my side , going through thick and thin with me is my family and god . I didn't know it is so hard to be happy . Last time , I can easily say " Today is the happiest day of my life " . Now , " today is the worst day of my life " . Oh gosh , I wonder what am I living for . Okay that's all I'm gonna blog about .
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